LOVE-Part 2

God is taking me on an unfamiliar route regarding this topic...I maintain that I am still on this 6-month hiatus for another few weeks...so no commitments can be made until after that time...
I have been reading about the body and living a life of holiness here lately...Like in a clear stern voice the Lord spoke into my spirit and said these words "love is humble, but never timid"... I thought to myself ..What?! What does that mean? So what I received is that humility gives room for growth and denotes strength of character...timidity lacks assurance, is shy, and easily alarmed..so we know that 1 Corinthians 13:5 says that love is not easily angered or provoked...Love is BOLD, it's BEAUTIFUL, it's BRIGHT, It's UNRELENTING, it's beyond our understanding at times. Maybe because it's the greatest commandment God gives us to exemplify(1 Corinthians 13:13)
I don't claim to know all the ends and outs of LOVE..I am really still learning...I had blocked myself off from experiencing any type of true intimacy(not sexual-cuz we know what God's word says about that), but just being timid and afraid of letting anyone in, that I had become desensitized and numb to the rawness of the emotions LOVE renders. I was literally aimlessly trying to feel my way through life and love like a blind person w/o a guide dog or wand...What is laughable now looking in retrospect is that I really believed that somehow someone would see beyond all those layers of ARMOUR and defense...I am not saying aimlessly fall in love with random folks...LOL...however don't be timid with LOVE...EVER!! Beyond your "greater judgment"....you have to be willing to takes risks and trust that if you have the Holy spirit that God will lead and guide you into all truth. There is an amazing song that takes me to another place every time I hear it..It's called "Risk" it's by PJ Morton...one of my fav lines says " So go on with life and in time you"ll see that what was and is was meant to be"...OH to be able to surrender to the Lord with those very words in our own lives. We can accept that "it is what it is" and move forward accordingly..
I am surely in unfamiliar territory right now in my life..I'm not in love...but I am allowing myself to surrender to my feelings of interest...I evaded this for so long unconsciously...being interested in people that I knew it really would not work out with...being infatuated with people that I knew things would probably never flourish with...I didnt realize how self-destructive I was being..I had to redefine and figure out things that I had no concern about for so long...We often say I want to be in love or experience it, but do we live in love (of course without over saturating ourselves) and truly live in such a way where you are ready to GO! when it's time to step into that ministry? Love in any respect is service and self denial...Like remembering to ask a person how their day was and knowing that that may require and open ear and attentive heart...not being resentful of giving up time that once was only your own....Trust me good people..I AM adjusting, so that when it's time to step into that role I am ready,willing,and able...not mean, selfish, and resentful..There's more, but I hope this is good reading for someone for now =)

Yall pray for me though as I pray for you..that I would continue to seek God about this thing called LOVE in all it's splendor...

LOVE YALL MUCH!!!!