For My Ladies :-)

Don't ever lose yourself in love..Lose yourself in God and let him lead you to the love you've always deserved...

Past experiences may lead us to think that adversity in a relationship resembles what we deem as what would happen in "real life", so we continue to hold on and press on with the belief that through the struggles we will learn and grow..TRUTH-relationships will face tests, hardships etc..But agony should not be the dominant feeling.. Certainly not very early in a relationship..If someone is unhappy with how you communicate you can adjust, but do not LOSE the uniqueness of how you communicate in order to please someone else..it creates a false sense of reality for them and you..When you're dealing with someone they deserve the TRUE you..good,bad,fabulous,lackluster(yall get what I'm saying)
I can speak for me... having grown up being taught to be submissive to men, sometimes we find ourselves submitting to men that are not our husbands or figures of authority...this causes confusion..most often we are submitting to folks that were never intended to be entrusted with that great sense of responsibility. The confusion that develops is not present because something is wrong with them, it's because they are not the one(s) that God intended to handle your heart. Though they may try, they will be unsuccessful...This is why as women we are to seek wisdom, so that we can properly discern what is supposed to happen with any man that enters our life..we have to be on point spiritually.

Ruth was obedient to her mother in law, but she also had to have some connection to God..her faith told her to follow that woman and her wisdom told her that BOAZ was worth putting it all on the line for..A wife knows the heart of her husband and supports him in his endeavors and provides sound wisdom when he might be going astray, that type of thinking and acting does not start after she says I do..it begins when she discerns that he in fact is the man of God for her..and as she feeds her spirit and navigates the relationship she learns and grows, so that when it is time to become his wife she is ready to go to the next plateau with him.

So I'm hiding all of these words in my heart, so that they will grow and flourish and not just be words that I post in a blog, but words that exemplify who I am.
This blog is for those of us who are not perfect, have messed up, and have found ourselves lost in love..I don't mind sharing my thoughts if someone can relate..I am real about mine..I have been there... placing my heart in someone's hands who either wasn't ready, didn't really want it, or didn't know what to do with it...Believing words spoken because I truly wanted to believe that the idea of "too good to be true" was not true...I do believe that there are good men out there, that love God and have great respect for women, but no one is PERFECT! I embrace every mistake because it showed up areas of weakness that I was able to SQUASH..I would not have known I possessed these weaknesses, had I not gone through those experiences.

Human relationships are ministry....ministry requires dedication, preparation, a certain level of maturity, clear knowledge of expectations, flexibility, and passion..It's a ministry that is constantly evolving and should be treated with great care..when someone says they are not ready to engage in a relationship with you (friendship, romantic, even familial) they are letting you know that they can not provide the necessary care required for this great ministry..respect their honesty and let it be...nothing that you do or don't do will change that..

These are things that we know..but sometimes someone needs encouragement and I don't mind providing it.

:-) much Love,
Nakiyah